Ok, what was the logical thing to do that day? Was I supposed to walk away and not react? Tell me, what does a woman do when he sees his husband kissing another woman in public? And not just the typical smack kind of kiss. This kiss was passionate and deep, and you know in your bones that this woman is not just a cousin or a friend. This is his lover.
You can get the best information about meditation in the 2019 meditation event. There’s information about the proper way of meditation, where you should meditate, what you should do with your body and mind, as well as how long you should do it before reaping out meditation’s benefits. There are many forms of meditation.
Where Should You Meditate?
Honestly, it is up to you because meditation is a mindfulness exercise that does not require a specific type of area. You can try meditating while sitting on the floor. That is usually what most people do. But you can also meditate while lying in bed. It doesn’t matter actually. But note, when choosing the bed as your spot might cause you to fall asleep.
How To Position Your Body While Meditating
Keep in mind that when you are meditating, you have to secure a relaxed body. For most meditation practices, it is fine to have your feet criss-cross on top of each, forming a pretzel-like biscuit. It is okay to put your arms on a resting down position. Then your hands should be on top of each and forming a cup shape. Then your back should be in a straight position with your head completely leveled forward.
How Long Should You Meditate?
Before starting to meditate, make sure you set the time for your desired session. It is essential because time tends to move a lot slower even before you begin meditating. Thus, setting the alarm will prevent you from continually wanting to know how much time you are spending with the entire session. Aside from having a goal, you will also keep yourself away from distractions. By the way, a 5-minute session will work just fine for beginners.
You can meditate by focusing on things around you, reciting words on your mind, or work on mindfulness and breathing. Honestly, anything is okay, depending on your preference.
We do not have the luxury to be negative thinkers at this time. Why? COVID-19 may be the most terrible virus outbreak in the history of mankind after the Spanish flu. But you know what, this pandemic will not cripple us. We are human beings, equipped with a mind to surpass problems in this world. And with coronavirus, we will rise above this and move on with our daily lives as survivors.
The 2018 mindfulness symposium has taught me a lot of things. I can still recall the lessons I have learned in that event. Well, I won’t say that I managed to incorporate everything into my life. But I am perfectly sure I focused more on what I entirely need. I got to learn that believing in myself is something I should often do. That even if things do not go my way, I will still make it no matter what. How did I manage? Well, here is some of the stuff I practiced through perfection.
Accepting Myself – We all have insecurities. That is the one thing that holds us from growing and becoming who we are. But before I end up messing my life over and over again, I accepted myself. I told myself that I am never going to be perfect, and that is okay because I don’t have to. I only need to appreciate the things I can do and improve those aspects that I think need improvement.
Practice Breathing – It may sound boring, but breathing exercises helped a lot. It removed me away from dark thoughts. Breathing helped me become sensitive about my mind and body. I became more aware of almost everything in my life. That includes my physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual needs. I became aware of other people’s feelings too.
Paying Attention – Mindfulness taught me that slowing down and taking time to rest is a must. In the busy world that I am living in, everything requires too much energy. But when I started paying attention to things that only matter, I realized there is nothing I cannot accomplish. I became engaged in finding solutions instead of giving complaints.
Living – I only had my life to fulfill. So instead of focusing on what I can’t have and do, I began living. I tried achieving and doing things that make me happy, and it is all worth it.
Many of us get tons of issues with productivity. It’s when we get overly productive but often get too burnt out all the time. We aim for a lot of accomplished things, but we often don’t know where to start. Well, the truth is that success doesn’t come from the tons of stuff we do. It comes from the effort we put into achieving one particular goal.
When we attempt to move so fast and wish for things to happen, we are not helping ourselves at all. Soon, we will start to have a brain fog that will make us feel disoriented. And in no time, we will eventually lose focus. Although there are times that we believe we can get to do things simultaneously, the truth is, it is never going to be half of what we should be doing. The constant multitasking only limits us to attain a more reasonable and worth-living advancement.
Various situations can cause a rift in a family. The most common one appears to be divorce or abandonment, considering the exes can’t co-parent, and the kids can’t grow up with mom and dad in the same house. When teens decide to do things their way and disobey every rule, they may end up going away and not talking to their loved ones. A conflict can also come if the son or daughter chooses to love someone whom their parents do not approve of. Instead of making their loved ones see why they have fallen for that person, they leave and insist that they can live happily even without their family.
The thing is, if you want to succeed in anything, you need to mend your relationship with your loved ones. I am not saying it because your family may have connections that you can never have. Even if your parents or siblings do not own a chain of hotels or have old money, you should make up with them. Here’s why.
Lack Of Ill Feelings Towards Anyone Invites Positivity
The first reason why you should make amends with your loved ones is that negative feelings can attract nothing but negativity. As Ryan M. Niemiec Psy.D. elaborates, “The strength of forgiveness has been shown to have a powerful buffering effect on stress. Those who are highly forgiving of themselves and others have a far less chance of having a mental illness.” For instance, you may resent your mom and dad for not giving their blessing when you introduced your boyfriend or girlfriend to them. You are probably angry at your parents for separating and leaving you to live with your grandparents.
What you should realize is that the past is the past. Continuing to harbor ill feelings towards anyone will keep you from inviting positivity. The latter is a crucial ingredient to success, so how will you survive without it?
You Cannot Stay On An Island Forever
I don’t know what it is about being in love, but a lot of people tend to act as if their special someone is all they need in life. They typically say, “Who cares if I don’t have to see my parents anymore? My man (or woman) is all I want.” Alternatively, “I can go through anything without my family.”
Your stubborn, childish side may bring such words. Your loved ones may not be agreeing with everything you say; that’s why you utter the words that you don’t mean. Truth be told, you may regret saying those awful things, especially when you realize that it turns you into an island that’s too closed off to visit. Thus, you can’t be successful that way.
It Feels Good To Know That More People Can Back You Up Anytime
It seems rare for someone to leave their family on their own. Often, they find the courage to do so because there’s another person or group of individuals who are supposed to catch them. That’s what usually happens when a daughter falls head over heels, or a son finds a strong connection towards his new friends. When either relationship does not last, therefore, they become more miserable than ever. “By building a list of people that you trust, with whom you can talk to in times of need, you allow yourself a strong sense of not being alone.” David Klow, a licensed therapist often says.
Now, with family members to back you up, you may still experience failure, but it may not bother you as much as when you are alone. After all, they can distract you from your problems and help you get back on your feet. And if someone makes you cry, you can be sure that they will avenge you at some point or at least trash talk whoever that person is in front of you.
Don’t wait for years to make amends with your family. Whether you or another relative has caused the problem, and it is technically similar to the situations mentioned above, you should not hesitate to call your loved ones and do everything so that they will take you back. “We only have control of ourselves and our own desire for growth and change. Part of that growth and change is deciding the type of person we allow in our lives, and the positive impact they can have on us.” Nikki Martinez, Psy.D. LCPC said.
Remember the things mentioned above to melt the ice that is probably covering your heart if it still hasn’t. Good luck!
Being a hard worker is perhaps a trait that your parents have ingrained in your mind from a young age. They may say, “The world will not kneel before you. You need to prove that you deserve to get something.” Or, “You should not depend on the family name or your inheritance all your life.” You can hear such words even from individuals who have kids who are practically born with a silver spoon in their mouth.
Because of such lessons from childhood, it reminds people not to stay idle for too long. Why do you think teenagers get part-time jobs? It’s because they want to avoid asking money from their parents as much as they can. Even when they enter college and are busy studying, they find time to earn money. This dedication to earning their keep can most likely be brought by kids to adulthood.
Now, considering you have been working all your life, you may be able to relax a little when you know that you have made it. Here are the tell-tale signs of that.
You Can Take Days Off Without Worrying About The Money You Should Have Earned
“How you view your finances and speak about them can change the way you feel about them. In turn, how you feel about your money will strongly influence how you manage it and deal with challenges.” Bahareh Talei, Psy.D. stated. As you probably know by experience, the individuals who have not made it in life yet will choose work over rest. They need money more than sleep or fun. They do not feel good about missing an opportunity to make dollars. Therefore, the first indication that you are in a better place now is that you do not mind taking a leave of absence for several days to relax or meet your family.
You Are Okay With Splurging Once A Month
According to Eric Dammann, PhD “We all have money issues and quirks of one kind or another. If we don’t know what those quirks are, they will emerge in a time of real stress or panic.” When you are making ends meet, you tend to have a tight grip on your money. You take account of every penny that leaves your bank account; you can never be seen in a fancy restaurant or shopping mall unless someone treats you.
Once you have made it, though, that tight grip seems to loosen. You may still not blow your entire salary on shoes or clothes, but you do not feel too bad about buying an item or two once a month. That’s your way of treating yourself, and you are 100% okay with it.
You Go To The Doctor When You Don’t Feel Well Immediately
Getting sick is said to be a privilege that only the rich people can afford. Because of that mindset, you may not have thought of seeing a physician back then unless you are in a life-and-death situation.
However, if things have gotten better for you financially, you may already be quick to set an appointment with a doctor for any symptom you feel. You no longer think, “Oh, it’s nothing too serious. I can use the money for medicine to pay rent.” The bills don’t bother you anymore; that’s why you can prioritize your health.
You Do Not Feel Scared Of Losing Your Job Tomorrow
Lastly, making it in life entails that you have enough cash in your bank account to sustain you for months or even years. Although it is no reason to slack off at work, this financial freedom does not cause you to be in constant fear of losing your job either. “Learning to cope with financial stress and effectively manage your financial situation can help you feel more in control of your life, reduce your stress, and build a more secure future.” A reminder from Elizabeth Scott, MS, a wellness coach.
Seeing the signs mentioned above in you is a cause for celebration. You have made it – you do not have to slave away for money anymore. It is something to rejoice about because not everyone can say that. Cheers!
It’s that time of the week again. The kids are all leaving for the day and going to their dad to celebrate with him his 40th birthday. I heard from my eldest daughter that they’re going to a 5-star buffet restaurant which is posh and elite. I can’t afford that. Shook; I can’t even afford a therapist to help me cope with my depression, stress, and anxiety. But it’s okay. I survived the dark days, and I know I will get through any other day in my life because I am strong. In my heart, I know, I will make it.
Are you aware that the rate of suicide around the globe has risen over the past few years? According to psychologists, this number can be alarming because it shows that many individuals are now suffering problems in their mental health. It is a sad reality that a lot of persons are not strong enough to face their problems and overcome their challenges. These people take their issues seriously to the point that they would rather die than suffer in this physical world.
In today’s article, we are going to discuss the top people that you must avoid if you want to feel better about yourself and be happier than ever. Take note that there are a lot of people who will only drain your energy and increase negative vibes in your life. Because of this, it is best if you will learn the various ways on how to care for your mental health. Our focus would be to gather the kinds of people that you must start keeping away in your life if you want to have an excellent mental condition. Here is the list:
The One Who Keeps On Complaining
“Toxic people are often competitive, negative, resist and even sabotage your growth and change. These people may have a number of motives.” That is according to Nikki Martinez, Psy.D. LCPC. With that, stop surrounding yourself with a person who has nothing good to say about a particular thing, individual or circumstance; He is the kind of person who has several complaints about almost anything in his life. Keep in mind that being outspoken about what one truly wants is way different from having something to say regarding everything. The more you accompany this individual, the more he contributes negativity in your life. As such, the longer you remain his friend, the more you become less positive, which can eventually make you lose hope about moving forward to happier and better days.
The One Who Wants To Change Everything About You
Another type of individual to avoid is a friend or acquaintance who keeps on pointing out your quirks and telling you to improve. Remember that it is okay to have someone to motivate you to change for the better. However, the moment the said person becomes too persistent in noticing your shortcomings or failures, then it is time to take the high road. Do not be afraid to end your relationship or connection with this kind of person. Instead, focus on loving yourself even more and recognizing how your uniqueness can make you attractive to everyone around you. “You have to get really clear with yourself first about what’s motivating you when you agree to do someone else a favor,” says Erika Martinez, PsyD.
The One Who Talks About Another Negatively
Beware of people who keep on gossiping about the actions and current circumstances of someone you know. Take note that talking against another person’s back is an unhealthy manifestation of one’s insecurity. Make an effort to keep distance against any person who keeps on talking negatively about your friends. Otherwise, you will be surprised that his bad influence has taken over you to the point that you will also end up becoming like him. Remember that you do not need to hear the bad stories of the people surrounding you. You must focus on lifting other people, especially those who need your help.
The One Who Influences You To Do Vices
Remember that it is crucial on your part to focus on improving yourself. As much as possible, avoid someone who will only keep on leading you to the wrong path. Learn how to assess the kinds of people in your life. Be true to yourself and admit the reality that not everyone is beneficial on your part. What you need to do is to cut ties with those who only keep on contributing to your bad habits. This tip is something you need to take seriously, especially if you are suffering from any forms of addiction such as substance abuse, drug dependence, or smoking addiction. Remember, “When trying to keep a positive attitude, you must avoid people who thrive on negativity,” explains Fran Walfish, PsyD.
According to recent research, the types of people you continuously surround yourself with are the same individuals who can shape up your life and even your future. This conclusion tells you one thing, which is to be careful with who you associate yourself with. Even if you are someone who cannot be easily swayed, it is still best to be mature enough to recognize when a particular person is not good for you. Stop fostering false or forced relationship because it will only get your hurt in the end or even ruin your life.
If you are not sure how to determine who should stay or not, our best advice is for you to seek professional help. The therapy sessions can be a big help in understanding who you are and knowing those who matter in your life as well as those who don’t.
Having constant fears and anxiety can be bad for your mental health as it may make you paranoid. Because of this, it is crucial or essential for you to know how to manage your fears. You must find ways on how you can control anxiety, especially if it is manifested through panic attacks. At this point, you probably think if it is possible to get over anxiety. Fortunately, there are several ways on how you can ultimately say goodbye to your anxious self. However, it is vital to point out that the process is not going to be easy. There are several challenges that you have to overcome so that you can be good at handling anxiety and fears.
Here are some of the tips and tricks that you need to remember:
Get To Know Your Fears
“Fear, or getting scared, is an emotion that’s part of our biology as human beings, just like other emotions such as sadness, joy and anger. It serves a purpose that’s crucial to our ability to survive,” says Steve Orma, PsyD, clinical psychologist. The first thing that you have to consider is to determine your fears. As much as possible, be aware of the people or items that are causing anxiety in your life. What triggers your panic attacks? When do these attacks usually happen? Getting to know your fears is an excellent way of acquiring a better understanding of yourself. Once you do this right, it will be easier on your part to solve your problems and issues.
Another technique that you have to consider is meditation. All you need is at least five minutes of your time a day to practice the art of meditation. Keep in mind that when you meditate, you are somehow relaxing your mind. It makes you more aware of what is going around you. At the same time, it also keeps you in the present moment, which is essential if you want to defeat anxious thoughts. “Meditation is not just relaxing, but to be keenly aware of the present moment while not interfering with mental activities that revolve around our little self.” Andrea F. Polard, PsyD said. When meditating, make sure to go to a place that you can be comfortable with.
Follow A Balanced Diet
Whether you like it or not, the truth is that your food consumption can affect your mood or even your mental health. Hence, it is best if you will look into your food intake so that you can determine when is the ideal time to control it. What you must do is convince yourself to go on a diet and start avoiding food items that are not nutritious. Instead, go for healthier food choices such as vegetables and fruits. Keep yourself away from too much sugar as it can make you weak.
Sometimes, all you need is to open up to someone who understands what you are going through. If you are not comfortable with discussing your fears to other people such as your friends and family members, then the best option available for you is to seek professional help. You can get in touch with the best counselor in the city and book an appointment of a counseling session. You will be amazed at how one meeting with an efficient counselor can already change your outlook in life. Take note that you also have an option to go for therapy sessions if you please. The choice depends entirely on you. As Ryan Mebust – LMFT emphasizes, “We all experience obstacles in life that keep us from feeling and being whole. Many have found counseling as a way to invest in themselves, their relationships, or their families in order to support a better or new meaning on life.”
Take The Right Medication
It must be noted that there are now several drug companies that have produced medicines that promise to treat anxiety experienced by many people. Therefore, you can already take advantage of these drugs so that you will start to get better. However, there is a need to highlight the fact that you must get a medical prescription from a doctor or psychiatrist. Do not randomly choose the medicine that you will take as it can put your life in potential danger. Be careful with what you take.
Accept Help And Support
When you have panic attacks, make sure to open yourself to receiving help and support from the people in your life. Do not shut them away just because you feel that there is something wrong in you. Instead, make yourself available for their helping hands. The moment you learn how to accept their assistance, you will start to feel better about your anxiety until it becomes a distant memory. If a friend or a loved one wants to take care of you, be sure to allow them to do it.
Anxiety is something that you can get over in one month or even a year. The progress depends on your state of mind. Be sure to remain positive no matter what happens.